You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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