Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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