Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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