This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
