we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
