i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize