rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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