Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
