If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Also, beer. Big fan.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
