Buhtt sex?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
