I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
