I hate all girls vehemently.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize