Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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