Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I think i got beer on your cat.
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