i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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