Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize