so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
