i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
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