My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
