we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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