White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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