its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
