And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
