Three words: puerto rican gang bang
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
