This girl is more easily done than said...
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
