Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
