I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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