But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize