he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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