if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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