How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
