u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
