so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
