he shaved USA in his pubs
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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