I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Randomize
