Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
It's never too late to be topless.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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