her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Randomize
