I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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