Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
the night ended with taco bell and tears
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize