just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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