Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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