Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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