Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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