I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
