just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
