Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Randomize
