worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
