Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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