How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
