3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Randomize
