Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Randomize