no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
